and should we be surprised?

I went to a 24 hour prayer night that one of my friends ran.
oh boy. it was so amazing. and should we be surprised?

at the beginning, i felt blocked. i had so much on my shoulders at that point. my worship team didnt feel like it was worshipping. ed was LOUD. a pastor who wrote an amazing worship song in australia faked his cancer diagnosis. it was really hard for me to let go of everything. really hard. my friend's knee was hurting pretty badly, so i put my foot (its a weird God thing we have between us...) on her leg and prayed for healing. and what do you know? all the pain was gone. and should we be surprised? my mom ordered that i come home and sleep, so i went home at 10 fully planning on waking up at 2 in the morning to go back. by the time my alarm went off, i was out. so i slept through it and ended up waking up at 4:30.
oh, ed LOVED that. he played with my mind so much saying that i have no stamina. he said, "you should starve so that people will know that you really have more stamina than they do. you cant even stay up all night, show them that you failed and you will make it right by starving." yikes right?
i went back regardless. and i got there to the sound of brad's voice and guitar. again, i felt blocked out. i couldnt worship with my whole heart. maybe i was still waking up...im not sure. the sun began to rise and so we jumped up on stage to worship through the sunrise. then i started to let go again. we plugged into the sound system. and just let go. i love it when im able to do that. its so free. i just sing whatever comes out...well, its like its not me anymore. i step back and God just pours through me out of my voice. it doesnt matter if im making any words, its just noise coming out. and i love that feeling. i used to be afraid of that because it was risky. what if im off key? what if it doesnt go with the music? well, the thing is, God is always on key and He always goes with the music. :]
anyway, after that, we went to get breakfast, came back, and worshipped. i went up there this time and played. i was beginning to let go more and more. and because of that, ed attacked me more and more. my friend left and i just sat there, feeling the attacks. each one harder and harder to hear. my friend came over and said "hey whats going on, talk to me." the only words i could really get out were "ed is loud". he took me over to the other guys and they all laid hands on me and prayed. i was bawling like a baby. then my friend said "speak out all the lies that you're being told right now. out loud." so i thought hard which was weird because ed had been so loud, i didnt really have to think hard to hear it. but now, there was nothing. silence. peace. ed wasnt there. and should we be surprised?
that night. like at 4 or 5...there were more people there and i sat on the floor to worship. my friend had come back by that time, she leaned over and said "God says the person you are supposed to be with isnt with you because you both have things to learn, not saying its the person you think it is...it could be, but it could not." man. right then, i dont know why, but that was so painful to hear. so i cried some more and my friend just held me.
earlier that day, my friend that put the meeting together said that he had a vision of him and me closing out the meeting together. he said that God was just going to blow us out of the water. it was going to be absolutely wonderful.
so it came time for the meeting to be over in about a half hour. and we went up and began to worship. i have never felt so free in my life. my friend leaned over and said "in the last ten minutes, God is going to tell you something and you have to share it." scary, i thought. im not a speaker. i have a voice to sing with, but thats it...i was scared. so i played anyways. i looked over to my friend, and he said "God wants three more." and i got to this one song by leeland. carried to the table. at the end, it says "you carried me, my love. you carried me." and i felt compelled to ask everyone to just make noise and sing that He carried them. He carries us every day through our struggles and temptations! and as we were singing that, my music fell off of my stand. it wasnt a big deal, i had memorized the chords. but when i opened my eyes, i saw a blank piece of paper. i lost it at that point. i couldnt even sing i was crying so much. so i just let everyone else sing for me. i looked at that blank piece of paper and it was so clear. we are innocent. we are saved by His blood. every day, He carries us through our crap and makes us cleaner than that piece of paper. we are pure and innocent in that. so i shared that with them. God totally talked to me in those moments. and should i be surprised?
He wanted me to play more because I hadnt heard Him yet. we just kept singing "fire fall down on us as we pray." and it was beautiful. i felt so connected to everyone, and so free at the same time. I finished out the meeting. I had so much power. well. it wasnt me at all. it was Him, through me. completely. i dont know how to explain it other than that. it WAS Him. i know it.
my friend's vision was right, i finished out the meeting.
and should we be surprised?