Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Finger Painting-Life Analysis...?

I once finger painted a picture of a tree.
I started with my hand prints. Right next to each other, reaching to the sky--or corner of the paper. I painted the sky red and black as a symbol of all the hurt I want to change. It took on the shape of a face, distorted and tortured. It cried from the pain and darkness that haunted it. I painted a crooked boundary between my hands and the red sky with a deep maroon paint. At first I wasn't sure why I did that. I wanted to erase it, but finger paint doesn't exactly "erase". I realized that I felt like there was something holding me back from the people I wanted to reach.
But what?
My tree became green, gold, and brown. The gold shot out of the hand leaves--a glow that I pictured I had. I knew it was because God is in me. He provides the power, the glow, that gives me the confidence to move. My tree trunk was pretty much normal except for the red line dripping down it. When I painted it, I thought I've been there before. Because I've seen the red, been the face in the tortured sky, I'm able to grow into a radiating tree. A tree--a person--that shines gold, shines Christ.
But if I have the power of Christ in me, why the crooked boundary?
The only thing I can come up with is fear. Fear is a monstrous beast that holds us back from doing our greatest work. I'm afraid of my past, afraid of entering the red sky and opening up old territory. My greatest challenge is breaking that boundary. Breaking through the fear that holds me back from the broken sky--the broken people. But with the power of God, the shine of gold, I can accomplish anything. Because I have Christ living in me, I can demolish that boundary, annihilate the the crooked line closing me in.

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